I apologize to all the mothers for this horrible occurrence which deplaned you to this page. Our heartfelt condolences on your loss.
The soreness you have been feeling in your heart cannot be juxtaposed to the joy that is on your way. We cannot take your pain even if we want to but definitely sending you major good vibes your way and hoping you believe in yourself just as much as the whole universe believes in you, mommies.
Miscarriage is the most terrific word to any mother which has a dreadful meaning that the most beautiful thing gets missed to be seen by a mother i.e., Loss of pregnancy before the 20 weeks whereas stillbirth is the loss of baby after 20 weeks.
It is found that 10-15% pregnancies end up having miscarriages overall, which are obviously not good specifics.
Causes- What motivates the miscarriages?
- Chromosomal abnormalities
- Infection
- Hormonal irregularities
- Maternal age
- Severe kidney disease
- Diabetes
- Thyroid
- Certain medication
- Radiation
- Addiction- drugs, alcohol, smoking etc.
Symptoms of miscarriage:
- Weight loss
- Belly pain
- Weakness
- Vaginal bleeding
- Back pain
- Heavy spotting
After miscarriage things:
- Fever above 100 degrees
- Foul vaginal smelling discharge
- Drowsiness
- Pelvic pain
- Increased urination
- Mood swings
- Swollen breast
Physical recovery after miscarriage:
Usually, women bleed for 2 weeks which create discomfort or irritation. They are recommended to not to do any physical activity including household chores, lifting weights and say no to intercourse, say no to use tampons while bleeding for few weeks, do not use douche- vaginal cleansing products. Say for 4-5 weeks, the menstrual cycle gets on the track as before.
Grief after miscarriage
Emotional psyche of different person is different. Some recovers it in a bit of time while some needs few months. Feeling depressed, helpless, demotivated which requires long time to recover. Some pregnant women get scared of their earlier miscarriage even, is a matter of concern too. So emotional recovery is depended on the person’s nature. Sentimental pain is a lot more than physical pain so women need a major support of their family to overcome that
Why miscarriage hands out sentimental shock?
It is the weakness of the flesh to feel sad, angry, hopeless or low after having such a bad hap. Since the brain and heart of the human are out of the mortal’s order. The nastiest thing of the mankind is expectation which gets down to disappointments. Can I say? Expectation is like a crime and disappointment is a punishment to it.
Lots and lots of thoughts and dreams for the baby which a mother always had and wanted those to be turned out to a reality now has remained dream only. On a loss of pregnancy, a mother gets depressed because she continues that unbreakable bond with the baby she has created in those days. Depression is the worst feeling one can ever feel, even men feel this on their partner’s miscarriage. But somehow men manage to overcome the depression in short time as compared to women.
Help your partner to overcome the miscarriage depression:
Why don’t people talk about after-miscarriage things?
After the pregnancy loss, women don’t get much care and ignore their feelings. Instead of that, family should try to make the women overcome this stumbling block. Loss is loss whether it is huge or wee.
She needs you!
- Don’t try to say her to forget and move on because her feelings are genuine
- Support her to accept that bitter truth but keep her away from negativity
- Listen to her, don’t stop her saying things and validate her feelings
- She wants a good listener therefore, don’t give advice at that time
- Try to not to fix her at a time
- Don’t try to control her emotions
- Try to handle her mood swings
- Don’t compare her situation with others because it will hurt her even more
- Offer your help to perform her everyday task
- Try to divert her mind by doing her favorite pastimes when her mood swings
- Spend time with her, don’t let her stay alone
- You must stay emotionally strong in front of her
- Try not to utter anything related to baby for some days or even a month
- Surprise her by putting together her favorite food
- Take her to the ride or out of her place
Explain her that good things come after the storm. In addition, prepare your partner to give another chance
Give yourself another chance:
Once both the partners get themselves out of that trauma i.e., emotionally and physically say for few weeks, they can try once again. Because, it is safe to try to conceive a baby after 3-4 weeks of miscarriage.
“Everyone talks about how issues can ruin people but nobody converses about tackling the after-problem things”